Sunday, August 14

The Day We Came Back From Truckee

Here's our idea. Here's our experiment. We might be crazy. But let's see. Let's just see. Because this summer has been amazing. This summer has been perfect. I couldn't have pictured any period of my life feeling as exquisite as it has these few months, yet here it is. It is around me, within me. It is unbelievable. It is impossibly deep yet astonishing simple. Love as all it can be. Love the way it should be. This summer has given me a glimpse of how to love unconditionally, how to coexist harmoniously, how to feel so unique and connected at the same time. How to be me and us and you and we. How to share. How to trust. How to view the world and how to take of advantage of all that it offers. Every day. Every moment. Jenny, you've changed me and inspired me and brought so much happiness to my life that I can't imagine this world without you by my side. It will be tough. It will take a lot of getting used to. But the fact that we're strong enough to run full speed at our diverging paths gives me hope that we will be in each other's lives for a long, long time. We have a lot of adventures to do in this lifetime. Some together, some apart. We have big choices to make and experiences to embrace. Some together, some apart. When we cross paths again in some foreign country by some sparkly sunset, we can share what we've learned and see where our future leads from there. 

In the meantime, we spend the weekend in Truckee at my grandma's house. Big dinners and a warm family gathering. Two lovely dogs. Hikes through the forest, through the neighborhood. Warm weather, clear skies and comfy beds. A sister who tells on me because I let her have a sip of wine, a mom as the independent happy woman I love, a grandma enjoying time with her family, Christian the family friend whose been around since before the Courthouse Coffee days, and Jenny feeling like such a natural part of the group it's like she's been there all along. We spend Friday and Saturday night there, come back Sunday morning. 

Trevor's memorial. I hadn't really thought about the other people that I'd see there until the morning of, when Bryce asked for Amy's number. It was nice to see him again, and Nancy, who I haven't seen in ages. Plus Amy, a recent mother, who I haven't seen since I don't remember when. It was a thoughtful ceremony. Food for the guests. A poster-board covered in pictures of Trevor. Flowers. Green balloons. A pastor said a few words, then the family spoke, then friends. All these faces from my past, grown up, holding babies, talking about work and being adults... It was sort of a trippy experience. While the group had a jovial attitude and kept the mood up, there weren't many dry eyes at those benches because Trevor was loved and a really good person and it is undeniably tragic to lose such a life. He was overwhelmed by the ugly side of the world and saddened that there could never be enough love to make it better, and so he spent the last few weeks soaking in the beauty of nature before taking his own life. You'll be missed.

Then I went hiking in Hidden Falls with Jenny and Iven. The timing was right for a hike with death heavy on the mind. Seeing nature. Smelling fresh air. Swimming in the creek. I hadn't been back to Hidden Falls since the last time I went with Sean, so it was nice to remember all those memories at the same time. Afterward it was dinner at Strings, then the 7:40 showing of Final Destination 5. Sort of a morbid day to see such a grizzly movie about death, I realize... I was pleasantly happy with the movie and glad they took decent advantage of the 3D. Loved the references to the other films. Probably one of the better ones of the series. Consensus: I'm still a fan.
































- Left to Fry

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